Thursday 23 June 2011

SOME FAMILIES BECOME STRONG EARLY

Use it or lose it.

If we examine the strong families of Papua New Guinea, we find that their family strength goes way back. In so many families, there is a grandfather or father who was a colonial policeman, medical orderly, soldier or road foreman.

All had a special pride in their work with the colonial authorities together with discipline and commitment. This would have been passed to many sons and daughters who also wanted to be part of the nation building.

Take any family of any politician starting with Grand Chief Sir Michael Somare and the late Sir Tei Abal. I am sure that the family of Sir Paulias Matane would have been strongly influenced by the educational role of their father and grandfather.

Strong families start early. I recall the days I spent as an officer at Igam Barracks in 1976-77. Once a term, the Battalion of Officer Cadets held a disco in their mess.

They were perfect gentlemen to several busloads of young student nurses from the Lae School of Nursing by special arrangement with the Principal. I often wonder how many  marriages came out of those discos.

This was the perfect match – a junior army officer and a young nurse. For those who did marry, their children would have already graduated from university supported by two professional parents.

The soldiers also lived a charmed life with their families. Many non-commissioned officers would have found that life in the married quarters was just what was needed for their children. There was electricity for study and watching TV. The soldiers had the discipline of training.

I look at my family in Australia. They have wanted for nothing in their quest for study. They had parents who were teachers.

Today the family has 9 university degrees. Elder daughter is a dentist with two degrees. Elder son was a Duntroon graduate and now a practising lawyer.

Younger daughter is a teacher with a degree in education. Younger son is a lawyer. The mother has two degrees and I have two. My father was a Queensland drover who sent all his children to high school.

I look at my children in PNG. The greatest gift I can give them is to be their father who has always spoken English at home.

They have come to understand every shade of meaning in English. They claim that Tok Pisin is their first language. Not true. If I pinched them at night, they would wake and respond in English. That used to be the test for German spies in prison of war camps.

My younger came to me from her mother at 2 years of age with only Tok Pisin. Now at 13 years old, her span of English vocabulary is enormous. No report in the media causes her trouble.

She wants to be a lawyer. I must admit she has style. “Daddy, I want to ask you something. I do not want you to get cross. You know I have just been selected for the new soccer team. Well last week, I broke two of my spikes. I need new soccer shoes. You know that soccer is healthy for me”.

How much? K35. When do you need it? Would now be OK? (sigh). Love you daddy. This lawyer will charm the socks off the average grumpy old judge.

Often I have her and sister read the newspaper reports of young women missing or raped. It is their education in stranger danger. I used to buy DVDs from the Discovery Channel.

My younger daughter in particular would be asked why there are earthquakes in Mexico. Five minutes later she would complete her explanation. She was equally interested in the pyramids and pharaohs.

I recall the 2011 newspaper report of a man who lived at Wild Life in Port Moresby with his children. He used to bring books home for his children and require them to write book reports.

All have completed high school. He had no education just a deep awareness of how to help his children succeed. He sounded like a grass roots professor in education.

The easiest reading exercise is for a parent to have a child read a story by Thomas Hukahu in the kid’s supplement of The National. The child is then required to tell the story to the parent and answer questions. Putting a story together is a valuable skill never taught in large classes.

By comparison with village children with village parents who have no education, the children with strong parents will usually be the ones who go to the top.

Children will not succeed if their parents allow them to smoke marijuana and drink homebrew.

1 comment:

  1. Bruce, it is interesting how you are bringing up your girls. They are already steps ahead of their peers because of the guidance and motivation that they are receiving at home.
    I had a father who brought newspapers home everyday and urged us to read them. (That is the cheapest reading material, by the way.) His friend, an American clergy, managed a news agent and from time to time we were blessed with comics, magazines and books that we pored over. Those are the kind of things that make the difference. - Thomas

    ReplyDelete